Is it not irritating when your partner does not want to be open about your relationship when you do? It makes you feel “less than” and question yourself, right? You start wondering: What if he’s ashamed of me? Is she keeping her options open? The negative comes before the positive and your thoughts and feelings become overwhelming until the only thing in your heart is worry.

I asked a couple of students here at San Bernardino High School how their relationships are going. They have both asked to be kept anonymous.

One student, a junior, said she’s afraid that the guy she’s talking to is keeping his options open. Even though she’s concerned, she said, “when I’m with him, it’s like all the worry and confusion disappears.” Totally understandable! She also said he likes to hang out with her often, but never posts about her. He also constantly posts about other girls. It does not look good, right? There’s no way of being 100% sure. I advised her to just keep her guard up and take baby steps.

Another junior said that he’s with this girl but she does not want anyone to know about them being in a relationship. Sounds a little fishy, if you ask me. There is definitely a side to her story, however.

I can see both of their frustration when it comes to their significant other keeping the relationship a secret. It’s not fun when you want to show off and be proud of who you’re with. It’s not a crime, but not everyone is like that. Everyone has their reasons for being public or private about their relationships – after all, it is called a private life. Sometimes, it just is not anyone’s business.

Don’t be worried too much. Maybe it’s better to move on, maybe it’s better to keep trying. But don’t get hurt. Nobody deserves to feel like their time has been wasted or their feelings have been messed with.

Want to know more? Take my quiz that relates to this topic! Find out why they’re keeping your relationship on the DL!

Why Is Your Relationship On The DL? Quiz